I've decided that Hawaiian news is ridiculously bad.
Breaking News for the Hawaiian Islands, July 19, 2011
-A driver is sought after crashing their SUV on the main road leading to my house (Kauaihau Road). This incredibly intelligent driver fled the scene of the crime on foot and left his friends in the car with injuries to deal with the police. I'm sure they'll never find him because his car wasn't registered... right? Plus... his friends would never rat him out.
-Councilman Harimoto is being pestered by someone who decided that if Portland, OR could find a way to keep smelly homeless people out of bus stops, so can Honolulu. A city comparison study on how Portland deals with bus shelter campers is going to end all of our problems. Stinky people are such a tarnish on Honolulu's clean image. I think that all people living under bus shelters should go rent apartments now in light of the outrage, and keep their stink to themselves. We could just fly them off to San Francisco, too, I suppose...
-Vandals have chopped down 10 ACRES of papaya trees on Big Island. 10 ACRES. In the middle of the night. No one heard them because they were ninjas with machetes. There is speculation that the vandals were somehow against genetically modified food. That's right: activist, machete-wielding, yuppie ninjas!
-Police in Honolulu are baffled as to how and why a 58-year-old Wahiawa man drove into oncoming traffic on H2 at 4:28am. He killed himself, and the woman who hit his Hyundai with her Toyota SUV is in critical condition. Clearly this was a case of him playing chicken and thinking that Hyundais are better than Toyotas. Hopefully this settled any rumors of Hyundais making a comeback.
-All drivers in Kauai can rest assured as a class called Traffic Skills 101 is now underway to teach uncoordinated bicyclists how to stay away from cars. In addition to learning how to look behind them while riding, recreational riders can also learn how to change a flat tire and how to look good in spandex (personally I think that they should save the fashion portion for Traffic Skills 102, since it is such a lengthy subject).
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Thursday, June 23, 2011
In the Mud of Self Discovery
I feel like I've been asking myself the question of "What Should I Be When I Grow Up?" for years now. Shouldn't I know by now?
I've worked in so many fields and traveled, seen stuff, picked up weird jobs... why can't I put it all together? I'm having a career crisis that is lasting for years. This economy is still pretty bad, but then I went and moved to a rural island. What was I thinking??
Currently, I work for a nonprofit that teaches anti-drinking/drugs and no-alcohol curriculum, infusing art lessons in whenever possible to make it interesting and tolerable. On Fridays I work for the housing projects teaching art to the at-risk youth, and have to suffer through watching these poor kids deal with family members that are incarcerated and parents that are quite likely abusing them. It's really sad. It makes me cry in my car. On my off days, I try to pick up hours with my derby wife's vacation rental cleaning business, which is definitely a shift in skills and somewhat refreshing. I don't mind manual labor... it makes the time go quickly. I am in negotiations to pick up some work with a guy my roommate knows that does faux-finishing and home decoration projects, so if that happens, at least I will be getting back into the artisan industry. I lowballed him on a rate in hopes that he will take me in and give me some steady hours.
I am beginning to contemplate some other options. I don't like the idea... but a girl's got student loans... and a grocery bill.. and rent...
I've worked in so many fields and traveled, seen stuff, picked up weird jobs... why can't I put it all together? I'm having a career crisis that is lasting for years. This economy is still pretty bad, but then I went and moved to a rural island. What was I thinking??
Currently, I work for a nonprofit that teaches anti-drinking/drugs and no-alcohol curriculum, infusing art lessons in whenever possible to make it interesting and tolerable. On Fridays I work for the housing projects teaching art to the at-risk youth, and have to suffer through watching these poor kids deal with family members that are incarcerated and parents that are quite likely abusing them. It's really sad. It makes me cry in my car. On my off days, I try to pick up hours with my derby wife's vacation rental cleaning business, which is definitely a shift in skills and somewhat refreshing. I don't mind manual labor... it makes the time go quickly. I am in negotiations to pick up some work with a guy my roommate knows that does faux-finishing and home decoration projects, so if that happens, at least I will be getting back into the artisan industry. I lowballed him on a rate in hopes that he will take me in and give me some steady hours.
I am beginning to contemplate some other options. I don't like the idea... but a girl's got student loans... and a grocery bill.. and rent...
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
He Is Coming
Guard your heart
He has lovely words that sing for days,
like sirens in Bermuda
Be wary... he is coming
and you, dear, are not ready.
Look at you,
your heart dangling from ribbon,
displayed behind glass
Be warned... the buzzards are circling
the forest, silent
he has arrived
He has lovely words that sing for days,
like sirens in Bermuda
Be wary... he is coming
and you, dear, are not ready.
Look at you,
your heart dangling from ribbon,
displayed behind glass
Be warned... the buzzards are circling
the forest, silent
he has arrived
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Tasmanian devils are adorable until they eat
So, Australia was pretty epic. There were so many crazy adventures and weird experiences that I have no idea where to start...
I guess maybe with the whole reason for being there... the derby clinic. First off, two of the local papers called Misfit and I "International Roller Derby Stars," making me so nervous and embarrassed that I just about crawled in my skin. That's a hella lot of pressure! Luckily, their eyes only stayed big and starstruck upon our arrival to the clinic for the first half hour or so. Then they started to loathe us. We have really awesome endurance drills, apparently ;)
Part of what was so amazing, despite the fact that this was 10 leagues and about 150 girls, was that it was all organized by the Victorian Roller Sports Commission, led by a really cool woman who likes the derby and likes where it is headed. The ten leagues got together to do the clinic because the big league in their state, VRDL, wasn't assisting them or helping them in any way to get organized and figure out how to go about things. They brought Misfit and I in to help structure their practices and teach them drills to work on basic skills and simple strategy. Most of the skaters had never been in a bout and only a few had ever scrimmaged, so really, we were working from the ground up. They were super enthusiastic about learning new things and were really respectful of Misfit and myself, and they didn't even groan when I made them do push ups for talking while I was explaining drills..
So the clinic was two 6-hour days, with a barrage of derby stuff. Misfit and I would powwow before each day to go over what drills each of us was doing and when we would switch groups, and by the end of the weekend, I had an amazing list of new material that Misfit added to my existing spreadsheet! I'm super pumped to have such a valuable resource. The clinic was a huge success and they are already talking about bringing the two of us back in January, when all of the teams will be ready to start bouting. I am really excited about that prospect, but I don't want to get my hopes up. It's pretty tough to get away from work for that long. I hope it works out.
After we did the clinic, Blondage (the rollergirl that put us up), Misfit, TnTeegs (another skater) and myself took an adventure trip to Tasmania! We had a blast. We did a ghost tour of Port Allen, wore tiger print Snuggies in public at every opportunity, and generally made an ass of ourselves on a regular basis. The funniest part was that I was fully expecting to have to deal with a lot of drunken nights where I was babysitting three adult babies. That wasn't the case at all. Contrary to the party girl image that many derby girls portray, we barely went out! Any drinking was brief and in moderation as I sipped cocoa before bed. We're a bunch of Nanas! Haha Oh well. Shh! Don't tell anyone! We like sleep!
After a very exciting trip, we returned to Melbourne area and taught two more day clinics for two different leagues, reinforcing some of the drills we had done in the camp. It was a great experience and a great time. I hope I can figure out how to do more of this derby clinic stuff. It really suits me ;)
I guess maybe with the whole reason for being there... the derby clinic. First off, two of the local papers called Misfit and I "International Roller Derby Stars," making me so nervous and embarrassed that I just about crawled in my skin. That's a hella lot of pressure! Luckily, their eyes only stayed big and starstruck upon our arrival to the clinic for the first half hour or so. Then they started to loathe us. We have really awesome endurance drills, apparently ;)
Part of what was so amazing, despite the fact that this was 10 leagues and about 150 girls, was that it was all organized by the Victorian Roller Sports Commission, led by a really cool woman who likes the derby and likes where it is headed. The ten leagues got together to do the clinic because the big league in their state, VRDL, wasn't assisting them or helping them in any way to get organized and figure out how to go about things. They brought Misfit and I in to help structure their practices and teach them drills to work on basic skills and simple strategy. Most of the skaters had never been in a bout and only a few had ever scrimmaged, so really, we were working from the ground up. They were super enthusiastic about learning new things and were really respectful of Misfit and myself, and they didn't even groan when I made them do push ups for talking while I was explaining drills..
So the clinic was two 6-hour days, with a barrage of derby stuff. Misfit and I would powwow before each day to go over what drills each of us was doing and when we would switch groups, and by the end of the weekend, I had an amazing list of new material that Misfit added to my existing spreadsheet! I'm super pumped to have such a valuable resource. The clinic was a huge success and they are already talking about bringing the two of us back in January, when all of the teams will be ready to start bouting. I am really excited about that prospect, but I don't want to get my hopes up. It's pretty tough to get away from work for that long. I hope it works out.
After we did the clinic, Blondage (the rollergirl that put us up), Misfit, TnTeegs (another skater) and myself took an adventure trip to Tasmania! We had a blast. We did a ghost tour of Port Allen, wore tiger print Snuggies in public at every opportunity, and generally made an ass of ourselves on a regular basis. The funniest part was that I was fully expecting to have to deal with a lot of drunken nights where I was babysitting three adult babies. That wasn't the case at all. Contrary to the party girl image that many derby girls portray, we barely went out! Any drinking was brief and in moderation as I sipped cocoa before bed. We're a bunch of Nanas! Haha Oh well. Shh! Don't tell anyone! We like sleep!
After a very exciting trip, we returned to Melbourne area and taught two more day clinics for two different leagues, reinforcing some of the drills we had done in the camp. It was a great experience and a great time. I hope I can figure out how to do more of this derby clinic stuff. It really suits me ;)
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Australia, so soon!
OMG I am such a procrastinator! I've been putting off formulating some sort of a curriculum for this clinic, but really I have no idea what I'm going to put on it! I have received an email list of a few things they would like to cover, but I'm coordinating the entire clinic with Misfit over emails as she is traveling all over New Zealand and Australia and not available to have a phone conversation :/
I just have to trust that all of this will come together somehow. It's weird to think I'm leaving the country in a week and have nothing but that to prepare for. Passport in hand, dog care squared away, timesheets ready to go. I have unfortunately been shorted hours on my timecard, but maybe that will pull through for me when I get the "short" check from missing two weeks of work. This is the time when I miss "paid" vacation time.
Totally ready to have an adventure. It has been far too long since I took a trip!
I just have to trust that all of this will come together somehow. It's weird to think I'm leaving the country in a week and have nothing but that to prepare for. Passport in hand, dog care squared away, timesheets ready to go. I have unfortunately been shorted hours on my timecard, but maybe that will pull through for me when I get the "short" check from missing two weeks of work. This is the time when I miss "paid" vacation time.
Totally ready to have an adventure. It has been far too long since I took a trip!
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Plugging Away
Trying to keep my head above water, picking up odds and ends jobs to fill in my time, tutoring, teaching art, eating too much food, procrastinating making my art piece for the Rourke Art Gallery show. Sounds like your average day in Anywhereville, USA. Slowly losing contact with friends back in MN. That part is a little depressing, but such is life. Constantly evolving, always moving forward, shapeshifting and throwing obstacles in our paths to overcome. Still doing the derby clinic with the newbies, and we're getting ready to test out. I think only a few are going to make it as many of the girls have dropped due to life circumstances. It will all be worth it if just two of them make it to the test out...
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Tsunami Warnings, Dog Attacks, and Other Surprises
Just plugging along over here, in the middle of the Pacific ocean.
There was a 8.9 earthquake on the coast of Japan a few weeks back. Tsunami warnings sent all of Hawaii to the hilltops and Japan had a devastating surge of ocean wipe out cities in minutes. Luckily, it was just another false alarm on Kauai. Big Island and Maui received some damage from the ripple effect, but all in all, Japan loses. I watched on news clips as an ocean of black water, debris, and flames swallowed buildings and sent cruise ships and passenger trains to the depths of the sea. The earthquake had rattled the coolant systems useless in their nuclear power plant and sent the entire country of Japan, Hawaii, and part of the West Coast of the U.S. into a panic of potassium iodide tablet purchases. Entire towns near the nuclear plant were evacuated as rumors of another Chernobyl spread like wildfire.
I had friends from all over calling to see if I was alive the day after the tsunami warning, and even though I was safely tucked in my bed that night on the top of a mountain ridge, I was watching Japan disappear on the news and thinking I might possibly die, too. Was that wave coming HERE? The countdown was the worst. We knew it was coming for hours. How big was not determined. Kauai would be hit first among the islands, which in my mind meant we would see the biggest surge. As I read about how a tsunami works, wrapping around my island from all sides and pushing everything in its path forward in a giant rush of tide, panic rose in my throat. I peered out my window, 2am, pitch black, towards the oceanfront I knew was there but could not see. Was I safe? I wasn't really sure. These are fears I've never had before. Tornadoes in the Midwest were a frightening possibility, but we had false alarms every summer, and for some reason they didn't scare me. I used to wonder why some of the students would howl and sob in the corridors of elementary school when we had tornado drills. I know, now, that perhaps a tornado was just as scary to them as this tsunami appeared to me. Unplanned, unheard of in my lifetime, and completely foreign. I didn't know how to react. I had people telling me to fill my bathtub with water, and others telling me to go to sleep, that it was nothing. What was I supposed to do? I decided to lie awake in bed until the witching hour of 3am had come and gone, uneventful. Finally I fell asleep, wind blowing peacefully through my window. Maybe next time it will be real, though. Maybe next time, I'll have an ocean outside of my window. Life is so unpredictable. Yet again, I am reminded that life is short. Yet again, I look at my bucket list and realize that I have a LOT of shit to accomplish!
Last week Oscar had his own scary moment, with a worse outcome.
I let him out to pee on a Monday morning, and when I turned away from the door, he bolted for the fence, broke through it, chased down a loose chihuahua, and tore into it. I think it would have died had I gotten there a few minutes later. The owner was of course hysterical, squealing as if her child were being slaughtered by a pack of wolves.
Of course that's what the neighbors thought.
The ex-husband screamed at me for owning such a miserable beast, that I should kill him, as I pried my dogs jaws off of the squeaky toy-sized animal. I carried my beast home in my arms, his confused expression telling me all I needed to know about his "attack." That chihuahua had earned it. They let that thing roam the block on a regular basis, and this time, he got too close to the fence. My dog's prey drive kicked in, and the hunt was on. Of COURSE I don't condone chihuahua slaughters, but I can hardly blame my dog for doing what dogs do. I can't fight against hundreds of years of genetics. I can't take the drive out of a dog that was bred to hunt rodents, protect homes, and fight. I was cited by the county for off-leash violation and must appear in court in April to determine my penalty. In the meantime, I am trying to pay the vet bill for the chihuahua, which, luckily, was pretty minor. I also put out a "runner" in the yard so that Oscar will be tethered and will not be able to breach the fence again. I started working with an animal behaviorist on Monday and she is helping me to redirect his attentions on walks and get him under control even off-leash. We have our work cut out for us, but it is a labor of love.
Surprisingly, my derby infatuation and devotion is beginning to pay off; I have successfully bartered private roller derby training for dog obedience training, and the fun doesn't stop there! Starting the Newbie Clinic on Saturdays has led to exciting prospects. Misfit Maiden of Minnesota Rollergirls has been traveling around New Zealand and Australia, and recently stumbled upon a leader of several leagues in AU that would like to hire her and MYSELF to run a Derby Clinic! They are paying for everything... flight, accommodations, food, and a grand stipend on top of it for my time! Funniest thing is, I never realized how much derby experience I was accumulating as I traveled down my road of life. Did I know I've been playing derby for 5 years already?! Holy cow! I had no idea! It's true. I started playing derby in 2007. I have played with three different leagues and was a key player and developer on two of them. I helped draft the constitution and bylaws for Oahu, and am currently drafting a constitution/bylaws for Kauai! OMG! I'm all official and stuff! I wonder if everyone has that epiphany moment in life when they realize that it's not all for nothing, and that experience really does take you somewhere... I'm so surprised, and so excited! The Bonesetter, also a former MNRG skater, has joined forces with several other skaters to form Triple Threat, another derby clinic training group. I am starting to network and explore possibilities of joining them for trainings overseas! The possibilities, as derby expands beyond the United States, are endless! At this point, I'm very excited, a little bit nervous and insecure, but also really ready to start reaping what I sow.
I have put a lot of effort, money and sacrifice into roller derby. It's about flipping time for that payback! AU in May, beeyatch!! Woot!!
"Work" remains undefined and strange. I am tutoring 2 days a week now at the Hawaiian Immersion School, where I have learned that students begin to learn English speaking and writing at the 5th grade level. I have plenty of opinions on this matter, but due to the fact that I am still learning and investigating this schooling concept from an insider's perspective, I am remaining mute on the subject. I am also working with the arts nonprofit to teach art therapy several times a month, art after school for at-risk youth in the low-income housing on Fridays, and FINALLY have received the curriculum guide for the program I was originally hired on for. We meet today to go over a battle plan on how to incorporate the expected curriculum through an art-based lesson strategy. I am excited to feel like I am earning my paycheck, and relieved to get the ball rolling so that grant resources are not being mishandled for my paycheck.
In other art-related news, Jim O'Rourke, mastermind and co-founder of the Rourke Museum in Moorhead, MN, has passed away due to a fall in his home. He will be sorely missed by the Midwest art community. I am pleased that his museum and all of it's exhibits scheduled will continue on undisturbed, including the annual Midwestern Art Invitational that I enter into every year with my father. I am currently working on my submission for this year's theme, "What Would Dante Do?" I had a quick trip back to MN a month ago and managed to find some pretty amazing pieces to use for my idea. Photos and details to come!
Staying busy, checking off items on the bucket list, realizing dreams, and tapping potential. Sounds like a good use of my life. Poverty is gonna lose, I swear!
There was a 8.9 earthquake on the coast of Japan a few weeks back. Tsunami warnings sent all of Hawaii to the hilltops and Japan had a devastating surge of ocean wipe out cities in minutes. Luckily, it was just another false alarm on Kauai. Big Island and Maui received some damage from the ripple effect, but all in all, Japan loses. I watched on news clips as an ocean of black water, debris, and flames swallowed buildings and sent cruise ships and passenger trains to the depths of the sea. The earthquake had rattled the coolant systems useless in their nuclear power plant and sent the entire country of Japan, Hawaii, and part of the West Coast of the U.S. into a panic of potassium iodide tablet purchases. Entire towns near the nuclear plant were evacuated as rumors of another Chernobyl spread like wildfire.
I had friends from all over calling to see if I was alive the day after the tsunami warning, and even though I was safely tucked in my bed that night on the top of a mountain ridge, I was watching Japan disappear on the news and thinking I might possibly die, too. Was that wave coming HERE? The countdown was the worst. We knew it was coming for hours. How big was not determined. Kauai would be hit first among the islands, which in my mind meant we would see the biggest surge. As I read about how a tsunami works, wrapping around my island from all sides and pushing everything in its path forward in a giant rush of tide, panic rose in my throat. I peered out my window, 2am, pitch black, towards the oceanfront I knew was there but could not see. Was I safe? I wasn't really sure. These are fears I've never had before. Tornadoes in the Midwest were a frightening possibility, but we had false alarms every summer, and for some reason they didn't scare me. I used to wonder why some of the students would howl and sob in the corridors of elementary school when we had tornado drills. I know, now, that perhaps a tornado was just as scary to them as this tsunami appeared to me. Unplanned, unheard of in my lifetime, and completely foreign. I didn't know how to react. I had people telling me to fill my bathtub with water, and others telling me to go to sleep, that it was nothing. What was I supposed to do? I decided to lie awake in bed until the witching hour of 3am had come and gone, uneventful. Finally I fell asleep, wind blowing peacefully through my window. Maybe next time it will be real, though. Maybe next time, I'll have an ocean outside of my window. Life is so unpredictable. Yet again, I am reminded that life is short. Yet again, I look at my bucket list and realize that I have a LOT of shit to accomplish!
Last week Oscar had his own scary moment, with a worse outcome.
I let him out to pee on a Monday morning, and when I turned away from the door, he bolted for the fence, broke through it, chased down a loose chihuahua, and tore into it. I think it would have died had I gotten there a few minutes later. The owner was of course hysterical, squealing as if her child were being slaughtered by a pack of wolves.
Of course that's what the neighbors thought.
The ex-husband screamed at me for owning such a miserable beast, that I should kill him, as I pried my dogs jaws off of the squeaky toy-sized animal. I carried my beast home in my arms, his confused expression telling me all I needed to know about his "attack." That chihuahua had earned it. They let that thing roam the block on a regular basis, and this time, he got too close to the fence. My dog's prey drive kicked in, and the hunt was on. Of COURSE I don't condone chihuahua slaughters, but I can hardly blame my dog for doing what dogs do. I can't fight against hundreds of years of genetics. I can't take the drive out of a dog that was bred to hunt rodents, protect homes, and fight. I was cited by the county for off-leash violation and must appear in court in April to determine my penalty. In the meantime, I am trying to pay the vet bill for the chihuahua, which, luckily, was pretty minor. I also put out a "runner" in the yard so that Oscar will be tethered and will not be able to breach the fence again. I started working with an animal behaviorist on Monday and she is helping me to redirect his attentions on walks and get him under control even off-leash. We have our work cut out for us, but it is a labor of love.
Surprisingly, my derby infatuation and devotion is beginning to pay off; I have successfully bartered private roller derby training for dog obedience training, and the fun doesn't stop there! Starting the Newbie Clinic on Saturdays has led to exciting prospects. Misfit Maiden of Minnesota Rollergirls has been traveling around New Zealand and Australia, and recently stumbled upon a leader of several leagues in AU that would like to hire her and MYSELF to run a Derby Clinic! They are paying for everything... flight, accommodations, food, and a grand stipend on top of it for my time! Funniest thing is, I never realized how much derby experience I was accumulating as I traveled down my road of life. Did I know I've been playing derby for 5 years already?! Holy cow! I had no idea! It's true. I started playing derby in 2007. I have played with three different leagues and was a key player and developer on two of them. I helped draft the constitution and bylaws for Oahu, and am currently drafting a constitution/bylaws for Kauai! OMG! I'm all official and stuff! I wonder if everyone has that epiphany moment in life when they realize that it's not all for nothing, and that experience really does take you somewhere... I'm so surprised, and so excited! The Bonesetter, also a former MNRG skater, has joined forces with several other skaters to form Triple Threat, another derby clinic training group. I am starting to network and explore possibilities of joining them for trainings overseas! The possibilities, as derby expands beyond the United States, are endless! At this point, I'm very excited, a little bit nervous and insecure, but also really ready to start reaping what I sow.
I have put a lot of effort, money and sacrifice into roller derby. It's about flipping time for that payback! AU in May, beeyatch!! Woot!!
"Work" remains undefined and strange. I am tutoring 2 days a week now at the Hawaiian Immersion School, where I have learned that students begin to learn English speaking and writing at the 5th grade level. I have plenty of opinions on this matter, but due to the fact that I am still learning and investigating this schooling concept from an insider's perspective, I am remaining mute on the subject. I am also working with the arts nonprofit to teach art therapy several times a month, art after school for at-risk youth in the low-income housing on Fridays, and FINALLY have received the curriculum guide for the program I was originally hired on for. We meet today to go over a battle plan on how to incorporate the expected curriculum through an art-based lesson strategy. I am excited to feel like I am earning my paycheck, and relieved to get the ball rolling so that grant resources are not being mishandled for my paycheck.
In other art-related news, Jim O'Rourke, mastermind and co-founder of the Rourke Museum in Moorhead, MN, has passed away due to a fall in his home. He will be sorely missed by the Midwest art community. I am pleased that his museum and all of it's exhibits scheduled will continue on undisturbed, including the annual Midwestern Art Invitational that I enter into every year with my father. I am currently working on my submission for this year's theme, "What Would Dante Do?" I had a quick trip back to MN a month ago and managed to find some pretty amazing pieces to use for my idea. Photos and details to come!
Staying busy, checking off items on the bucket list, realizing dreams, and tapping potential. Sounds like a good use of my life. Poverty is gonna lose, I swear!
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